Black Ghost

This thing is dripping in awesomeness. No, I mean I really, really liked it. Original, thought-provoking, emotional, all that good stuff. I don't have much to correct, as everyone above ...

Hey again. I don't have much to say about this next part, other than it's good as usual. :) I couldn't find anything significantly wrong with it. I liked the ...

Hey Kylan! Another great installment. I love your dialogue, it's very snappy and realistic at the same time. It flows well, and the conversation seems very natural. Your description is ...

I liked it at the beginning, it sounded as if you were going to start a good discussion about something insightful. Though, at the end, it seemed as if you ...

Um...where's the conflict? Honestly, there's nothing happening. Really, ask yourself, does a girl waking up, contemplating a few things, and then leaving her bedroom make for a good read? I ...

Ok, first off, you're a very good writer. You have so much emotion and description flowing through this that it's like being drenched in some decadent chocolate. Second, I couldn't ...

Hi! I thought this was really cool! You had very flowing and lush description throughout the whole thing, although it never felt as if you were trying to hard. I ...

Hi! Interesting piece, though I'm not sure the emotions came across as best as you though they could. I stand between the thin string that divides life and death This ...

Hey Kylan! I really liked this, interesting new story your brewing here. I couldn't really find anything wrong with it, though I thought this part seemed a little odd. A ...

I don't have much to add besides what the others have said. Good story. :) I actually found myself really engaged in the pencil's narration, and I really loved how ...

Hi there! Welcome to the site, and I'm glad you decided to post something! :P I'm magicman, obviously, and I'm here to critique. :D Firstly, I see you have a ...

I thought the pacing was good, actually. But in a couple of parts I noticed there wasn't the "gasp" kind of moment that I think it needed. Let me see...I ...

Hey! I gotta say I loved this part. ^_^ “What the hell do you think your doing, you bastard?” you are = you're “No, you're not. You're screwing him up. ...

Pretty good chapter, even though I just came into the story. XD The only complaint was that some of the dialouge seemed a bit off, but nothing really major. One ...

Hey, Lynlyn. ^_^ On to the critique, then? :P Isaac rubbed his eyes and rolled out of his hammock . “Who is it?” The sailor shrugged as the youth rolled ...